The first round of the tournament has been seeded!
Carl Stonewall VS La Puta Negra
Kurt Murphy VS Weirdbeard
The Bounty Hunter Buck Lawless VS Knuck Finn
Mick "Truck" Drivor VS Koschei The Deathless
Also...Cap'n Bitcheyes takes on Somebody's Dad! We decided to spice things up a bit, and make this a DOG COLLAR MATCH! Both wrestlers will be joined together at the neck with a 12 foot cattle chain, attached to a 1 and a half inch leather collar around their necks! No holds barred!
And don't forget the hot tag team action, as we see Jomax & Jaybob square off against The Porkchop Express, and The Rock-n-Roll Foundation challenge the Syndicate Tag Team Champions...The Sweet-Winkle Connection!
This Wednesday will also see the WAR TO SETTLE THE SCORE! Serengeti Betty, the only wrestler to really beat Buck Trundle this season, will challenge him for his World Heavyweight Title! This is the rubber match...they both hold a victory in their series...who will come out on top of this treacherous game of rock paper scissors?!?
WEDNESDAY!!! ...WEDNESDAY!!!... WEDNESDAY!!!...
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101 comments:
Heh heh... The Capn's gonna whup Somebody's Dad like he was a junkyard dog and I ain't gonna give him no treats or nuthin either!
Uhhh... did ya forget a match there, buddy? Maybe the dadgum WORLD'S TITLE MATCH?!?! Y'know, Ah'm startin' ta see what Wheezleton was talkin' bout, how you're tryin' ta make the title seem like it ain't all important n' whatnot... Ah got my eye on ya, Blackjack. Ah don't trust you no better'n I trust anybody else in this here den a snakes.
Trundle, maybe if you didn't surround yoself constantly with sausage serpents you wouldn't feel like you were in a den of snakes.
Carlita, get ready to feel my wrath.
Well fuckin' well, well... it looks like our rematch is gonna happen sooner than later.
La Puta, you got one over on me ONCE. But it ain't like ol' Carl's never been beat. I've won 42 titles in my career, and since I ain't a champ currently, that means I been beat 42 times at least. One loss to you ain't no big thing in the grand scheme of things.
You've got a couple days till we fight, so gloat while you still can. I guarantee that come Wednesday, you won't be gloatin' no more.
I beat you twice.
Valentines kisses.
What? What the fuck you talkin' bout, bitch? You beat me once in that barbed-wire, broken glass match when I ended up with pieces of broken florescent lights all stuck in my back. Took me a week to pull all the shards out. When was the other time? The time me n' Buck Lawless beat you & Thunderhammer for the tag titles? I don't think so.
I know I been hit in the head a lot, but is ol' Carl gettin Alzheimers already? That would make four of us - Blackjack forgettin' the World Title match and Somebody's Dad & Rocky Sukiyaki forgettin' they've got contracts with the league and never talkin' on here.
Our first match of the season, biotch.
xoxoxo
BLAO!
La Puta might do well to remember that she clearly doesn't know what the fuck she's talking about.
Ms. Negra, your first match of the season - the first match of your career - was the hardcore victory of which Mr. Stonewall speaks. The next time in which you met was in the battle royale for the World's Championship in which you eliminated the then-champion, Mr. Stonewall before being elminted yourself by Mr. Buck Trundle.
Perhaps your mind is so addled with drugs and revolution that you are now considering this battle royale elimination as a victory? While I admit it is quite a feather for one's cap (or afro, as it were), it is not a victory in the traditional sense.
So the score is 1-0 in your favor, unless you count the recent tag title match that was won by Mr. Stonewall and his erstwhile partner, Mr. Buchanan "Buck" Lawless. In that match, Carl emerged victorious - thus making the score 1-1: a tie.
However, if one was to include this so-called "battle royale victory", then I must admit, the score would be 2-1 in your favor. Perhaps the two of you are working on a best-of-seven?
Good day!
Have you guys checked out my most recent blog post?
You got bags a dicks on layaway Peavey? Handin' someone they ass is a victory. But all you know about "handin' asses" is puttin' yo hand in asses.
Carlita know. Oh, she know.
Yes Dave Ken, we saw it. Intergalactic Strap-on Hungarian Brokeback championships an' shit. Got it.
An since when Carlita gots ta be havin' pimply prom-date rejects talkin' fo him?
Hi, my name is
La Puta Negra and I can't seem to
just get it all out in one damn post!
La Puta, maybe if you put down the crack pipe and focused more on your wrestling, you'd be a champion right now. In lieu of dedication, you choose to relive the glories of the beginning of the season and as such, you find yourself alone and angry. I feel sorry for you, La Puta. I really do.
Henderson,
Stop being such a whiny little
douchebag, and get your greasy little
face out of here, and
stop bothering Ms. Negra. She's trying to prepare
for her match. I hope she fucking
cuts you, bitch.
So let me get this straight. Not only does Blackjack run a second rate fed, he also rips off other peoples jokes? Way to bite Peavy's style. Is there anything you've done first? Certainly not your wife cause The Turpz got there before you did! (zing-a-ling!)
And since when does La Pupa Noopa need tired old washed up former managers to speak for him? Excuse me, her? I guess shes lost her spine. Probably spends too much time up on brokeback mountain with Blackjerk and his Sweet Winkies.
TURPZZZZ FOREVAAAAAAA!!!!
Oh shit, it's lookin' like a catfight up in this bitch! Meee-ooowww!
Mr. Turpin, I couldn't have said it better myself. It really just goes to show how pathetic Blackjack has become. I mean, this guy is a champion so many times over and a two-time manager of the year, yet he now spends his time stealing jokes from fans like myself.
Granted, I am a fan of above average intelligence... but wow, have the mighty fallen or what?
I would go on, but I don't think I need to. Luckily, Frontier Anarchy has dedicated fans like myself and Mr. Turpin who are willing to call "bullpucky" when the need arises. If more fans and wrestlers were has honest and dedicated as we are, perhaps this league wouldn't be in the financial straights that it is in (Oh yes, Mr. LaLonde, some of us DO read the Wall Street Journal!)
Where is Ronnie Havershiem when we need him?
Excuse me, I meant to as "If more fans and wrestlers were AS honest as we are..."
Sorry, sometimes I get so irate I mistype things. It's because I care so much.
I fully expect Blackjack to start copying me and making mistakes more often (and not just the mistakes he makes in his pants... oh yes, Mr. LaLonde, some of us DO talk to your drycleaner and we know all about "Skidmark Row" as they call it)
whuddup dudes! wanted to tell you about my bachalor party tomorrow night its gonna be a PPPPAAAAATTTAYY yo its gonna be hella sweet i am stoked to be getting married and everything and wanted to let you dudes know to come out to my last night as a free man gig just kidding sally i love you babe! but seriusly it will be so sweet cuz my bud jeremiah got back from afgenistan and he is having it at the vfw by the river cuz he gets a deal being a vet and all even if he aint all old and stuff like the vets that hang out there and we are getting some kegs too and jeremiah is cool but we cant shoot no guns cuz he hes got shelled shock but ma sayz its not as bad as when we was kids and his brother taped those cats to the train tracks and he had the shakes so bad he peed on the scholl bus so its gonna be fine and i really hope you dudes can show up and paaaaatayyyy with me and everything!
oh and koch dude since its at a militery astablishment and all you got to wear a shirt dude
Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, Turpz....
Maybe that's why no one imitates your little faggot ass! Blackjack and the boys in the front office are taking this league to new places, and gaining fans and support by the day! They have the hottest fueds in wrestling today,(Carl VS La Puta, Serengeti Betty VS Buck Trundle, Cap'n VS Koschei,etc...etc...)as well as bringing back the glory of tag team wrestling, and the greatest action a wrestling fan could ask for(tournaments, cage matches, dog collar matches, streetfights, etc...etc...)!
So what I'm sayin' is...Turps....Peavey...Suck a mutha'fuckin' dick, because y'all be perpetrating on The Sydicate, y'all! Stop hating, and stop masturbating!
You two, and all your bullshit is like a Somebody's Dad VS Rocky Sukiyaki match...it don't matter, because no one cares, and no one will pay any attention to it! The difference is that we actually have to hear you talk about it! (unlike Somebody's Dad & Rocky Sukiyaki, because no one has heard from those two ass monkeys at all!)
So in closing, y'all need to stop fronting, and start punting, because y'all is losing yards fast!
TOUCHDOWN! FRONTIER ANARCHY GRAPPLING SYNDICATE!
Captain, I've already received legal warnings from the ASPCA in anticipation of the beat down I'm going to give you. I wish I could put a disclaimer on this that no animals were harmed in the making of this match but you're going to end up the beaten dog that they show on tv to while they play that stupid fucking Sarah McLachlan song. I'm going to heap so much abuse on you that dog eating people in the Philippines are going to say "That's too much, rather to kill the dog than go that far".
I'd be interested to see how much of the Frontier Anarchy budget goes to paying off plants like Mr. Willykers to spout their inane profanities.
Everyone knows you're on the FAGS payroll, Mr. Willykers. Don't "front", as you might say.
And if I may look a little further into the rabbit hole: Blackjack speaks for La Puta and now Mr. Willykers speaks on behalf of the Blackjack? Oh, I'm sorry - I guess he's too busy figuring out new ways to run professional fantasy wrestling into the ground. He probably can't be bothered to defend himself. Or maybe he's just waiting for the next great speech to come out of the mouth of one such as myself so he can steal it.
I've got the same team of lawyers as Gene Simmons does, Mr. LaLonde. You might want to think twice about challenging me.
Peavy, I appreciate the support, but I don't need it. I'm fully aware of every occasion upon which La Puta Negra has made ol' Carl look the fool and I don't need reminding. Maybe La Puta needs some reminding though?
Former World's Champion
Former Syndicate Tag Champion
11-time Hungarian Champion
Former International Swedish Fish Champion
12-time Tag Champion
16 other singles titles that I don't feel like writing out right now.
And need I mention the fact that I'm already in the Hall of Fame?
You're messing with Carl Stonewall. The best of the best - fuck all the rest. It don't come easy. So enjoy what you got while you got it - for instance, your teeth. Come Wednesday you won't have those either.
Who wants to hear from Ricky Suck-a-yucky anyways? That dude may have been hot shit at the beginning of the season but he couldn't get a crack whore to suck his dick if there was a hundred dollar bill hanging off his sack and the formula for the cure for HIV tattooed on his ass. How do you say whole lotta hype about nothin' in japanese? What a waste of time up in this bitch!
Peavey, you would sink so low, as to associate with anyone associated with a has been wash up like Gene Simmons. Just like the old Kiss song, Parasite...that is just what you are...a parasite.
You wanna talk about biting on someone else's style...hey Henderson...Ronnie Havershiem called...he wants his act back!
Blackjack and Frontier have done anything but run this sport into the ground! They have taken it to the next level! The only thing being "run into" anything around here, is a giant dick..."run into" your ass!
Now, as for something that someone actually gives a damn about around here...
The Cap'n VS Somebody's Dad in that dog Collar Match! Oh snap, son! I can't wait! The Captain thinks he's all rock-n-roll -n-shit, but Dad is gonna take that chain and earache that mother's eye! he'll be turning that rock-n-roll down, and sending that punk, the Cap'n to school! Keep 'em in line Pops!
lemmetellyouse bout Gene Simmons (hic!)
one time I fall down in snow and pass out and Gene picks me up, y'know? YOU KNOW?! Man, youse don't know (hic!) nuthin' bout me, man.
Whudwhurrwe talkin' a bowt? Oh man, that's gonna stain.
Gonna win me a belt, gonna win me a belt.
Gonna win me a belt, gonna win me a belt...
On WEDNESDAY!!!
*ahem* Hiring the same lawyers as Mr. Simmons does not mean I am associating with Mr. Simmons. It is merely a statement suggesting that Mr. LaLonde should watch his back should he attempt to steal any of my material again.
Ronnie Havershiem wants his act back? Well who took it? Are you implying that I did? That's funny; I don't see any muckracking dirtsheets published by yours truly. I only see a fan who is concerned with the future of the sport.
Shut your mouth, Rudy - I mean Darnell. Clearly you have no idea what you're talking about.
Man, Peavy amps suck dick dude. You should change (hic!) your name to Marshall or sumptin. Hey! Who wants to party? I got a samsonite full of blow riding shotgun in my ride and I can (hic!) meet up anywhere!
Whut is this place? I mean, you guys are cool right?
No, I mean COOL.
Is that my agent on the phone? Tellim I'll (hic!) play anywhere anytime!
What is this again?
Peavey, you've been dreaming about being a mere hair on Ronnie Havershiem's nutsack since this season started. But instead, you have become the infected, yellowish, puss-filled, dome of a painful in-grown hair on the nutsack of fantasy pro wrestling. I know it will be painful, but I hope somebody squeezes your brillo-pad head in between their thumb and finger, and pops you, causing all of your vile, infected opinions to splatter on a dirty toilet seat, and relieving us all of your painful rants. A good pair of tweezers what's left should take care of the rest....
Your right, though...the only muck that you ever raked across a dirt sheet was the muddy brown fluids that oozed out of your incest loving Auntee's nasty beaver onto your Empire Strikes Back bunk bed sheet, after a long afternoon of "babysitting" you while your mom put in another 12 hour shift at the local titty bar...
Pffftt... exactly the type of drivel I've come to expect from a fan of Frontier Anarchy.
Tell me again, Ms. Rayne, how you can feel justified in insulting a woman who choses to work at a gentleman's establishment when you parade your naked body around the internet for all to see? You are a hypocrite and a whore... but then, I guess I'm just saying "You're one of Blackjack's people".
You disgust me. How much is Blackjack paying you to lie (down) for him? Is there no one here who can speak their mind? Or are you all on Blackjack's payroll?
Well Peavy, marketing 101 lesson here. Don't fuck with the popular wrestlers no matter how dastardly they may be in baiting you.
While La Puta may be a disgusting whore and braggart, she moves merchandise, while you sir, are on the consuming end of this little scenario. And while the customer is always right, the customer is almost always full of shit as well.
On this note, stay tuned for Intensive Industries' Frontier Anarchy Grappling Syndicate action figures (patent pending)!
Swoon the the sexy antics of our seven inch Serengetti Betty (anatomically correct)!
Laugh out loud at the hijinks of "The Cap'n B" with pullstring voicebox: "Heh heh! Watch where you put your finger an' shit kid!".
Hide under your blanket, as plush Koschei the Deathless murmers ancient druidic chants into your ear at night!
Rocky Sukiyaki, with detachable free-standing loss column and kabuki dress!
Carl Stonewall! Listen to his power-molded joints creak, just like in real life!
La Puta Negra- comes with broken glass and tetnis! For ages 8+.
Buck Trundle, comes with two optional personae!
Kurt Murphy, available only in select locations as part of the "Kurt and Sally Hooter's Pack".
And of course, Jo Max and Jay Bob, complete with grappling hook and championship gold!
Oh! And don't forget the 10 inch C.E.O. Blackjack Billy, complete with tiny pack of dogs yipping at his feet!
But what of Weirdbeard?!
Not to worry, loyal fans! While still under production, our Weirdbeard/Blackpube (patent pending due to legal negotiations with F.U.C.R.) figure will come equipped with miniature bucket and blank file card. YOU write the story!
Jo Max...Jay Bob...We are so happy you are working with us! We have a product idea for you boys!
What about a Henderson Peavey fan action water-weinie! just like the ones Whammo used to make! you could even make it flesh colored, with a purple end, so it even looks like old Henderson! Or the Henderson Peavey super soaker! It could even spray real bullshit!
What about "Somebody's Dad Strength" Geritol? Or, Sally Fingerle warming lube...for your pussy?
What about me?
Really Knuck?
Look out for our Frontier Anarchy Minions Blister Packs!
Unleash hordes of Cap'n B's Capuchin Troublemakers!
Impress your friends with your skills as you ply a new trade with La Puta Negra's Pickpockets, Bandits n' Thieves!
And for a limited time only, Somebody's Dad "Not-takin'-no-crap" Straps! Turn the tables on your parents!
As an avid collector of wrestling action figures, I am intrigued and excited at the prospect... But will the Blackjack figure be accurate?
When you place it in close proximity to other Frontier Anarchy figures, will it devalue them?
And if you place it next to a large gold belt, will it render that gold belt worthless and make it a laughing stock?
Henderson,
If this league bothers you that much, why do you watch? You are obviously not a fan...of this league... or this sport. So, what gives? Why don't you just go away, and let the fans of fantasy professional wrasslin' enjoy their sport in peace.
What is your obsession with Blackjack? Did he wrong you somehow? The rest of us fans think he is awesome, and pretty much saved this sport from going under! Why don't you just cram it up your cram-hole, and take off, you hoser!
I'd totally eat your soul and cause you to burn eternally in the flames of my hellish stomach, being digested for 1ooo years...but I think it may taste too bitter...even for this old hell hound. So fuck off, before I find one of my friends to haunt you and your entire family!
And you can go ahead and call your "lawyers" on me!...HAHAHA! I already OWN their souls! Muhuhahaha!
To answer your question, Mr. Bubba, my obsession with Blackjack can be answered by simply scrolling up! You'll notice that I had been engaged in a war of the words with La Puta Negra when Blackjack LaLonde decided to insert his nose into my business.
Accepting his challenge, I gave him a bit of the old "what for" only to find that while Blackjack loves to start, he is unable to finish. According to a Mr. Rick "The Turpz" Turpin, this is exactly the reason why Mrs. LaLonde has sought refuge in the arms of The Turpz. Personally, I know nothing of their sordid affair - I don't like to gossip, myself.
Anyhoo, Blackjack's ladyfriends and boytoys have taken it upon themselves to speak for him, but we've heard nary a peep from Mr. Jack himself.
Therefore and thus being, I will henceforth refer to him as a "pussy".
Ah don't care if'n he fires back at ya or not, Peaves - Ah just wanna know why he neglected ta mention the fact that the greatest damn World's Champion of all time was defending this here title against ol' Serengetti Betty this week!
Look at tha' picture, freak-a-zoid...it's me, it's me, it's that d-o-double G, son. You see, I like this business so much, I bought the company!
Actually, Peavster, you have made some ugly comments about this company and it's wrestlers on more than a few occasions. Now, everyone is entitled to their opinion...that's all well and fine...but I own this company, and them's my employees that your trashin' there, on your little macbook!
So, I guess that when you mess with the bull...i.e. the Syndicate...then you get the horns...i.e. me...Blackjack Billy, son!
now, I don't aim to get in a war of words with a little piss-ant like you...hell, it's a waste of my breath...I could get better use out of that air walking up some stairs, or jerkin' off on your mama's big fat titties...
So, have fun on my message boards, Peavster...and be nice...because you never know what the future holds. You could be in line at a store, and suddenly someone sticks you in the back with a syringe full of AIDS...or one Christmas eve, while you and your family are all asleep, some crazy dude dressed as Santa might creep into your house and turn on the gas, and blow your fucking house up...or you could be minding your own business, eating at your favorite resturant, and take a big gulp of your milkshake, only to realize too late that it's actually DRAINo, and your guts are churning out of your mouth, and your stomach is melting....
I guess, what I'm saying, is why be so negative...enjoy the positives in life, because something or someone very bad could be just around the corner...
Sweet dreams, Peavster...
Listen to him Henderson. He speaks the truth. You never know what COULD happen. You could be tra la la la-ing around town and take a sniper shot damn straight in the middle of your forehead, or be attacked by pirhanas at the pool, or crawl into a bed full or razor blades, or show up to work every Wednesday, win a few, lose a few, wrestle a clean, professional match and get set the fuck on fire as a bullshit gimic by some whackjob knuckledragger of a boss who cannot even remember to put your World Championship Belt match on the card because he's too busy gnawing on the salami titties of some Brazilian discharge! And you don't want THAT, now do you?
Well said, Betty.
I'm glad to see you finally mustered up the balls to show your face on here, BlechJerk, but "too little, too late"... sort of like you.
Oh, I'm sorry. That's "too little, too early" in your case.
Tyler Van Leppard: Whooo, baby! It's gonna be a hot time in the old town tonight!
Jack Halen: Yeah, there's gonna be dancin' in the streets! But you know what I don't understand, brother?
TVL: What's that, baby?
JH: You'd think that a guy who's running a wrestling league would have more important things to do than insult fans!
TVL: Yeah, like announcing title matches, baby!
JH: Or updating the points pages, dude!
TVL: Or making sure the title page is up to date when the results go live, brother!
JH: Yeah! Leave the fans alone, 'JACK! This is America dude, not Soviet Russia!
TVL: And what a country it is, baby! I'll tell you what, I was born in the USA and I've been rockin' and rollin' all over this country!
JH: And this Wednesday, we're gonna rock n' roll all over the Sweet Winkle Connection and walk home with the tag team titles!
TVL: Go for it!
This is America...and I CAN say whatever the hell I want. By the way, all the pages are up to date, as well as the title match being announced. That was updated the day before yesterday. So, turkeys...why don't you just worry about your matches, and not what old Blackjack is working on.
Also, Betty: You would have never been set on fire, had you not LOST your match...so if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen...unless of course that is your place...then, burn baby, burn.
R-n-R Foundation: By worrying about me and not The Sweet-Winkle Connection, you are seriously taking your eyes off the prize. Bad move when you are facing one of the greats. Trust me...I managed many wrestlers to the top in my career, and that is a rookie mistake. I wouldn't be suprized if they hand you your asses, but I guess you couldn't say that you didn't deserve it.
Peavster: Whatever...I think your hair was the inspiration for Blackpube The Pirate...Nappy & Shitty. Now go suck your momma's dick boy. I got bigger fish to fry...
Tyler Van Leppard: Eyes off the prize? Brother, you are outta your mind!
Jack Halen: Yeah baby! We've already achieved it! We've been to the mountaintop...
TVL: Yeah! And we've been the to the edge. And we stood and looked down...
JH: We lost a lotta friends there, baby - we got no time to mess around!
TVL: 'Cause there's only one true prize, daddy, and it's ROCK AND ROLL!
JH: That's right, baby! And though some like to deny it, we KNOW who supplied it!
TVL: You got it, dude! I'm talkin' about our Heavenly Father! Some call Him Yahweh, some call Him Jehovah...
JH: We call him totally righteous! Through Him, all things are possible and because of Him, we're standing here ready to take the wrestling world by storm!
TVL: Yeah baby! And there's a little saying I like to repeat from time to time - do unto others as you'd have them do unto you!
JH: And we're gonna do it to the Sweet Winkles this Wednesday, brothers!
Yeah Betty, if you can't take the heat get out of the kitchen - sort of like how Blackjack insulted me and then disappeared for the remainder of the day because he couldn't take the sting of my verbal jabs!
And thank you for noticing my hair, Mr. Jack. But don't think I am unaware of your thinly veiled racial slurs. Yes, Mr. Jack, I am Jewish. What's next? Will you insult my yarmulke?
Speaking of which - RnR Foundation - I appreciate your help, but please don't push your Jesus shit on me. He's a prophet, nothing more. Let's just leave it at that and be cool, okay?
Tyler Van Leppard: Hey baby, you do your thing and we'll do ours!
Jack Halen: Yeah, we're here to love, not hate - JC himself was a Jew, brother!
TVL: "And you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free!"
JH: That's John 8:32, baby!
You know, it's bad enough that fans come here and get insulted - now Blackjack is insulting our ethnicity? Wow. Good thing I've got blond hair and blue eyes. At least I know Blackjack will like me.
Hey Sally! I'm so excited for your wedding this Wednesday!!!
Thanks Pammy! I'm so glad we made up and you'll be my maid-of-honor!
Hey Kurt,
Looking forward to that bachelor party tonight. I hope you don't get so tanked that you can't wrestle in the tournament tomorrow! Good luck and all the best, buddy - my marriage might not have worked out, but I still believe in the institution and I hope to find that special someone someday.
thanks,
Dan Browning
You will, Dan. You will.
You're such a good guy... any woman would be lucky to have a guy like you.
I could care less about your ethnicity...I was merely observing that your head looks like a big patch of pubes.
Blackjack yearns for that day when black will not be asked to get in back, when brown can stick around ... when yellow will be mellow ... when the red man can get ahead, man; and when white will embrace what is right. That all those who do justice and love mercy say Amen.
Peavster, you are just a hateful, confrontational little man. Here in The Syndicate, we like our confrontations to take place in the ring. If I catch you spewing anymore hate filled, racist rants...or insulting anyones religion, race or creed here again, then I will ban you, and block you from this board, and you will be out in the cold.
Also: Pammy Dinkins...shut your whore-trap. No one asked your whorish little opinion...you nasty whore. Now...go back to whoring like a good little whore-bag, you cum dumpster whore.
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Tyler Van Leppard: Let he who is without sin cast the first stone, daddy!
Jack Halen: Well, that must've been Blackjack, 'cause he started picking on Peavy for no good reason!
TVL: Yeah, Peaves was talking to La Puta and then the 'Jack just started talkin' smack!
JH: But Peavy should've turned the other cheek!
TVL: That's true, baby - but it isn't our place to cast judgement!
JH: Hey man, I'm just happy we've found a place where we can ply our wrestling trade and spread the good word of the Lord most high!
TVL: Me too, baby! And maybe we can save a few souls along the way.
JH: Speaking of which - we're glad you're so into prayer and spreadin' the word, Blackjack! But remember - you catch more flies with honey!
TVL: On the other hand, the bullshit you're spreadin' works just fine too!
JH: Whooo! Rock it, brother! Now let's rock our way to the titles this Wednesday!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson sucks!...Henderson Sucks!...Henderson Sucks!
But the Rock-n-Roll Foundation kicks ass! I hope they take it to the Sweet-Winkle Connection on Wednesday! Keep it rockin' daddy-o's!
I bet you want to see that rock hard foundation "take it" to the winkle, Darnell! Old news fag.
God DAMN. Is this a fantasy wrestling site or one of those websites where people go to bitch about there exes? Blackjack, Darnell Carter, Shank Sampson, all of you: The Turpz understands that things didnt go well between you and this Peavy asshole. He broke your hearts or gave you a case of herpes or whatever. Get over it or get some counseling. The Turpz has got bettter things to do than read a Gay Loney Hearts column!
Like gettin one last ride in on the Sally Fingerme roller coaster before it goes off the market!
TURPZ RUUUUULLLLEEEEEEZZZZ!!!!
IS BLACKJACK HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH LA PUTA??? What else could explain his heated defense of her?
Just kidding. Blackjack is a stand-up guy. Obviously, otherwise I, Ronnie "The Hammer" Havershiem would be digging up his garden like a stray, exposing the fleshless, bleached-white knucklebones of Truth!
But in this case, Blackjack's doin' aaaaaaaaaaall-Right!
Henderson's just got ta get off my jock before he gets "hammered", as it were. Keep trying kid, but my routines are almost ruined due to the numerous teeth marks you've left on them. Fing your own bag, cat.
You know, I'd heard rumblings of stuff like that. I guess Wheezleton is going to write a tell-all and... well, tell it all. The rumors, the lies, the deciet, the backstabbing.
As for me - I worked for Blackjack for a while. I was head custodian. I've seen and heard a few things around. The kind of stuff that would put asses in seats, or buyers in bookstores, as it were.
Don't worry Mr. Henderson. You've taken a great deal of heat, yet you've yet maintained your current location in the kitchen.
Now, Henderson, grasp the pot of boiling water and make your stand! Do it now, take your enemies by surprise and fulfill your destiny!!!
Ixnay on the AckJackblay, Mr. Ken.
As of this point "no evidence" has been "officially" gathered. Therefore, there is absolutely "no reason" to think that future charges may be pressed against Mr. Jack.
So there is "no reason" to align forces in preparation for an all out legal assault in tandem with certain tag teams in Frontier Anarchy that will result in "giant" payoffs for those involved. Get it? "Wink wink".
Et tu, Havershiem?
I find it astonishing that a man such as myself can be attacked and ostracized on a board where I come only to find kinship.
It is the right of every fan to insult whichever wrestler he chooses just as it is the right of Blackjack LaLonde to insult whomever he pleases. Why he has chosen to attack me... I can not surmise. I did nothing to him.
But to slander me because I look different than he does and then accuse me of being racist? To call me hateful when he was the one attacked me with no just cause?
Well, that simply makes you a liar, Blackjack. A liar and a fraud.
I hope that someday we can live in a world where people like Blackjack don't exist. Where unbridled and unwarranted hatred do not run rampant... but alas, this is the world into which I was born and I love it either way.
I feel sorry for someone like you, Blackjack. I really do. But most of all, I hope that someday you can find true love and overcome your weaknesses. I hope that you can break free of the self-doubt that plagues you and causes you to lash out so.
Clearly you do not want a fanbase like the one I provide. A fanbase made up of passionate, intelligent individuals who only wish to speak their minds. For all those who wish to follow a man such as the Blackjack, here are a few words which I have hanging above my desk.
"In Germany, they came first for the Communists, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Communist;
And then they came for the trade unionists, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a trade unionist;
And then they came for the Jews, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Jew;
And then . . . they came for me . . . And by that time there was no one left to speak up."
Buck, Betty. Nobody cares bout yo sissy match. I hear that when you be fightin', they gon put on an infomercial 'bout anal leakage o somethin' like that ta make up fo the money they be losin' cuz they gots ta pay fo the electricity ta run shit while you two be up on stage pseudo-fuckin' an workin' out yo frustrations on each other's dirty bits.
Ah, hey.
What up Peaves?
Tyler Van Leppard: Wow. What a crazy storm of anger. I hope we can weather this storm and get through it.
Jack Halen: Hey man, you know where I find strength?
TVL: Through the healing power of rock n' roll?
JH: That's right; but also through the good book. After all, God gave rock n' roll to us!
TVL: Put it in the soul of everyone! Hey, drop some knowledge on me, man!
JH:"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning"
TVL: Psalms?
JH: 30:5, baby!
TVL: ALRIGHT! We supply the rock and roll...
JH: But GOD is the foundation on which we stand!
TVL: Go for it!
Henderson...go wash your face. It smells like Weirdbeard's ass. If your so smart, & know so much about wrasslin', then why don't you talk about the matches? Oh, that's right. You actually don't know shit. Loser!
Hey Dave! How are ya'? Are you going to be backstage again on Wednesday?
SRT & WPL: You two faggots are Bible Thumpers, too?!? Oh, we can't wait to whip your ass now!
SRT: Because ours is the Kingdom, the power...
WPL: & the glory...forever & ever...
SRT & WPL: AMEN!
SRT: Wednesday, when you walk through the valley of the shadow of death, it's ok if you are a little bit afraid...
WPL, yeah, but our rods & staffs will bring you no comfort, though...
SRT: Just a beating!
SRT & WPL: WHOOOOO!
Scroll up a bit and you'll find that I was talking about the matches until Blackjack interrupted me with his hate, Mysti Rayne.
I guess a better question might be, why would someone start a wrestling organization only to use it as a vehicle of hate? You'd better ask Blackjack.
Tyler Van Leppard: Hey, don't worry about it, Sweet Winkles. We're not THOSE kind of Christians!
Jack Halen: No way, brothers! We don't hate you 'cause you're gay!
TVL: That's right! Those people corrupt the good word of the Lord! Our God is a God of LOVE, and that means love for all of His children!
JH: That's right, brothers! There's room in God's Kingdom for everyone - straight or gay!
TVL: But there's only room for ONE set of Tag Team Champions!
JH: And that's us!
Hey Mysti,
Yeah, I'll be there - it's the wedding of the century, babe! Kurt and Sally. I'm so happy for them.
Good. Good.
100 BITCHES! Do I win a prize? If so, I want that prize to be the Rudester making a special appearance. Praise be to Allah, that guy is one superfan.
crap hend man that sucks you got all slammed and everything today but dude dont be letting all the negetiveness get you down cuz like life is about good stuff to and you got to keep your chin up outa the water and keep knowing you got stuff worth living for even if you dont got a girl or nothing and when people r saying you suck and all and even if its lots of people all saying you suck real REAL bad like today so keep keeping it real dude and dont become a suacide like sallys friend who watched the heathers movie and killed herself cuz she wanted peopleto not think she was a nasty skank but like they still did cuz she fucked the consulor at school and liek all the guys at the kfc who were in the junor high and all and everybody got herpses so it could be way WAY worse dude remember that k?
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